With such a large festival to cover (though it was only one day of live action for myself), I feel the need to break this up into small, bite size pieces. The day was most certainly long and taxing none-the-less, but worth it? – Hell Yes. Not joking around here: this was the best outdoor show I’ve ever witnessed and quite possibly the greatest spectacle I’ve ever been apart of. Three days away from the festival and I’m still exhausted. Fair warning: this post will be absurdly long.Now, with a concert of this caliber, you have to pick and choose which artists you want to see and work around the busy schedule. All Points West is no vacation – its work, if you really want to see the best that the festival offers. My whole mindset going into the day was “I’ve got some great buds with me who are willing to give anything a listen. And though most of them are here solely for Tool, maybe I can break them out of their shell and have them hear some really spectacular sounds." But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t there to hear some of my favorites bands myself.The day began in a dark hotel room with dead bodies lying around. … That sentence is only half accurate. The truth is, I woke up with a nasty hangover in The Engleside Hotel, beach front property in Beach Haven, Long Beach Island, NJ. 
The dead bodies were actually the intoxicated carcasses of my brothers, who would later abandon my offer for an early ride home up north. After grabbing a quick shower and throwing all my clothes into one tiny sports bag, I left my two day L.B.I. vacation with my family behind for a Saturday in Jersey City. The road trip back was smooth sailing. I got through my entire Sonic Youth CD (The Eternal) and then switched over to some old mixes halfway up the Garden State Parkway. I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful the day was. Sunny, warm, and prime for sunburn and sweat; and great outdoor music, of course.
Once home, I did the most appropriate thing first: checked my Facebook (come on, two days away from Facebook is a long time for me). But to my dismay, no one had done anything uber exciting and no one had died in any interesting or abstract way. Soon after, the phone calls started coming in: “Hey, when we leaving,” “Are we getting food first.” “Wait – we’re taking trains,” “What are you wearing,” “Should I bring more money,” and “Are we going to die in Jersey City”.
Answers: 9 o’clock. Yes (Bagel Brunch). Yes trains. Light clothing. Yes, at least 80 bucks. And yes, we’ll die in one way or another on our way in/out of the city.
Just to make things a little more personally, I’ll give you the names of my party members: Sean (older brother of a friend who had to sell a ticket), Camilo (always up for new experiences), Eric (die-hard Tool fan) and Guo (Asian friend/only underage friend with us). They got the answers they asked for from me, but even with whatever I was telling them, the fact remained: I was just as unsure of what would happen as they were. At 9 o’clock, we got our food. Ate it quick, told the same jokes we did during Warped Tour a few weeks back, pissed off the locals, and talked about what our expectations were of the festival. Then it was off to the train station.
The transportation was quick, and after a few transfers and double-checking, we found ourselves stepping off the light rail (covered in A.P.W. and lawyer services advertisements, by the way) and onto Liberty State Park. We were there. In a few hours, we’d be bound to hipster co-concert-goers, eating over-priced food, drinking over-priced beer, and hearing some of the greatest bands to grace the tri-state’s largest festival. What we saw immediately: green pastors around the park. A clear, blue sky with limited clouds. The New York City skyline prominent in the distance, just across the Hudson River. We walked about a mile to the entrance, making enemies with our immaturity and silly antics. We weren’t there to make friends; we were there to have fun and be ourselves. I don’t believe we necessary fit the “indie rock” or “rock festival” persona's, but dammit, we knew good music and we knew how to have fun, even if little kids didn’t (SPOILER ALERT: Bratty teenage punks do not know how to have fun when watching Arctic Monkeys or Tokyo Police Club. But hey, if kids weren’t dancing to them on MTV Live, why should they dance at the festival? Bitches.) So here we were. After months of anticipation and 120 bucks dropped, we were ready; or as ready as we could ever be. Bring on the show.
Here’s a list of the schedule below:
So there are some solid acts here, right? The bad part: a lot of them run into each other or just merely play at the same time on different stages. Predictable; comes with the territory. Up first (besides a scoping out the park for “shorties”: Urban dictionary: shorty: “A term contrived by some asshole or group of assholes to mean a sexy or attractive female. A term I wouldn't ever use to describe a girlfriend, close female companion or a desirable female of whom I'd like to get better acquainted with.” And grabbing our first of seven allowed Bud Lights), we headed over to the Blue Comet (main stage) to hear up ‘n’ comers Cage The Elephant. After a breakthrough on New York City radio, I was anticipating how they’d play out early on the big stage in what I’m guessing would be there first major festival.
The result: Entertaining. The leader singer was enigmatic, and as for the rest of the Kentucky band, they were solid as well. We came in a little late on their set, but were pleased with what our ears were being acquainted with. In all honesty, I’m still not familiar with the band, only the intoxicating, Beck-esque, and heavy-acoustic tune “Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked”. Later in the set, the lead singer would move into the crowd, connect with those willing to meet him at his feet, sing with him into the microphone and enjoy the exposure. Nice touch, Cage. I will have to listen to your self-titled debut record a listen and see what else you have going for you. Readers: What are your thoughts on Cage The Elephant? Feel free to comment with your thoughts/opinions.Next up: We had to pass on Cool Kids. And this may seem as a bit of a stab, but at a festival like this, hip-hop music really is the alternative. Not many people were there for them anyway and the crowds were not strong in numbers. And so our reason for passing up on their act was for Tim & Eric’s. 
Judah Friedlander, a.k.a. “World Champion”, opened up the crowd for Tim & Eric, basically doing his whole “I’m better than you routine” about how he’s great at sports and what not. I yelled out that I did track & field, the 1500m in particular, and he made fun of me because “I had to breathe through an inhaler before I could finish the 1600m”. Anyway, all of his jokes seemed to work off the audience so I give him props on the spur-of-the-moment comebacks. When he had said it all, he was done and someone else from “Best Week Ever” came out. He didn’t really tickle my funny bone. My mentality was simple: “Shut up. Just bring out Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim already (Spagett, specifically).”DJ Douggpound graced the crowd with his appearance and spinning-of-mixes/jokes. Always a good laugh. Although his John Travolta-dead-son joke was a little too soon and too harsh. This was my second T&E experience, and I was hoping for the best, until I realized they wouldn’t be on for three hours like they were in Philadelphia. Bummer. 
But they did come out with new costumes during the opening “Diarrhea” sketch (still hilarious). They jumped into the crowd and we all pushed to the gate. Eric landed right on me. And these guys have so much girth these days that ten skinny indie kids could barely hold them up. Afterwards, they received their little awards, some more diarrhea-esque videos of the new season were previewed on the monitors, and then out came for the Kid’s Break rap-duo.Sean caught Eric’s workout towel, which by the end of the day was covered in mud and smelling like utter shit. The tunes sampled: “I Sit Down When I Pee”, “My Sister’s Cute”, “Wipe My Butt”, “Dirty Socks", and the latest hit single “Bloody Nips". Knock-out funny. Followed by more Douggpound, more video clips (new Brule’s Rules!), and then the Tim & Eric touch skit. Over aleady? Damn. And no Spagett, Beaver Boys, James Quall, Richard Dunn, or Sire. Understood though; they’ve got limited time on a small stage. The best part of my life soon followed and it’s all captured on this fan’s YouTube video:
Yes, I got touched! (I'm in the white shorts, flipping a shit). I will now succeed in both the business world and life itself. No other person has ever touched me better. I was thrilled. And just like that, the three bowed and we’re done for the day. Top performance of the day so far. I will never forget this.
Moving on: After being touched by Tim & Eric (and being informed about Hot Tub sales and losing my awesome plantain shades in the crowd), it was time to leave the comedy behind for the day. We trekked up the park to get a good spot for one of the most anticipated acts of the day: Sheffield, England’s own and Britain’s next big thing (possibly), Arctic Monkeys.First complaint: Now I hate to start out with this, but the little kids (ages 12-18), just straight up do not know how to act at a show like this. And because the childhood obesity rate is at an all time high, I could barely push these giant glaciers around to get a better view and move to the music. Luckily, a British couple moved in next to me, and we small-talked Arctic Monkeys, old music (The Smiths, in particular), soccer (football), and what not during the song changes. The Monkeys themselves spoke little, which was a reoccurring theme with all bands of the day.
The music spoke for them. And as I wrote before in a previous, the Monkeys are truly moving in a bold and new direction. Slower jams dominated most of the set, including some new tunes off the highly-anticipated third LP, Humbug. However, mid-set tunes such as “Brainstorm” and “Fluorescent Adolescent” turned the idle crowd into spontaneous dancers. A lot of movement aroused quick, and finally, the kids moved away from us before any fists were thrown and anyone was kicked out. The Monkeys, now long-haired and stocked in American Apparel clothing, proved their power in the late set, ending things with their latest “Crying Lightning”. All in all, I give the performance a B-. I was hoping for older tunes, especially “Mardy Bum”, but sadly, beggars cannot be choosers. Best song of the set was “I Bet You Look Good On The Dance Floor” or “If You Were There, Beware”. The young crowd ruined things and for a while, I was feeling a little glum. However, all my frets were soon to be put to ease: Gogol Bordello was ready to hit the stage in less than an hour.
Kool Keith (and Ice T?!?) were in-between acts, located at the Bullet stage. Like I said before, the hip-hop acts struggled. But I’m glad I got to see “Blue Flowers” live, one of the most popular Kool Keith tracks. And Ice T can still freestyle – glad to see Law & Order and other acting gigs did not totally destroy his music credibility. Though my friends did not enjoy the songstylings of the act, I was certainly up for the diversity, and Kool Keith gave me a much needed time to catch my breath.
Much to Jim’s dismay, I opted out of St. Vincent. Sorry, good chum. The festival for me had to be as upbeat as possible, and I knew I couldn’t go wrong with the gypsy punk, Gogol Bordello. Now I had heard many rumors of this wild Eastern European and multi-ethnic band’s on-stage presence: a mad, crazy dance party with cheerful dancers and rambunctious punk music from the festival’s most obscure group of performers.Right off the bat, I’ll make this claim: Gogol Bordello was the most exciting set of the entire day. Hands down (in the mud). And why? For reasons previously stated: 
The gypsy punk rock, the mud pit, the dancing, the fans, and the atmosphere - it was the perfect formula for a killer show. The crowd really connected with Gogol and for an entire hour, we all felt apart of a Woodstock revival. Most fun act of the entire festival. From the shit-storm of rain the day before and the constant pounding of shoes on the field surface, mud and filth were as much apart of the show as the music. “Start Wearing Purple” and “Wanderlust King” were calls to legs as the mud bath ensued. Huge globs of mud soared through the air and onto people’s faces, backs, and legs. It was everywhere. There was no point in trying to stay dry from the mud; you were going to be covered if you wanted to have a great time, so you might as well just have accepted it 
from the start. Camilo, not familiar with Gogol previously, found himself laced in the arms of gypsy punk fans, kicking mud and smiling ear-to-ear from the sounds of Gogol. Absurd band members, including scantily clad percussionists, a Willie Nelson of fiddle players, and a luchador vocalist, as well as Gogol, the madman himself, stole the whole damn show.After a while in the mud, I had to just stand back for awhile and embrace the music. This is why I did not have a lot of footage of the performance: most of time was spent trying to stay balanced in the mud, while dancing and laughing with random strangers that I’ll never seen again. Grade: A. Words won’t describe this any longer, but maybe a video will. Enjoy.What a great show already. This alone would’ve been a great show already. An odd pairing, but I wouldn’t complain. Now it was time to get my money’s worth. Bring on the headliners.Again, we had to back out of one of my most anticipated acts: the ever-lovely Neko Case. Off the heels of her new record Middle Cyclone, I was readily eager to hear album favorites, “This Tornado Loves You” and “People Got A Lotta Nerve”. But then again, you have to pick and choose. And after our umpteenth visit to the beer garden (by the way, flirting with the beer girls got us to keep some of our beer tabs, so we rounded the night off with about 9 or 10 beers each), we took a journey through the mud fields and past the city of tents to the Queen Of The Valley stage to witness, for a third time in my life, Ontario, Canada’s Tokyo Police Club.Clear, cut, precise: This on-the-ball, young, talented, and energetic indie synth rock group graced the tiny stage with lights, flash and authority. The quartet took a while to get to the stage and once again, little kids formed a wall difficult to maneuver by. 
Nothing new here, guys. Only one or two newbie tunes. Not much can be said other than, “What a nice reminder that these kids haven’t lost their way yet”. Here’s a great tidbit: they’re working on a new record in New York City. I expect great things (especially now that they’ve moved to the better country in North America). Best tune(s): “Nursery Academy”, “Juno”, “Citizens Of Tomorrow” or “Cheer It On!”. It’s tough to pick a favorite when each and every song flowed so well with no error. For such a young group, I am always impressed by their live performance. They’re humble and serious about their music, but fun-loving and respectful. A trait similar to Bloc Party, a band that I’ve seen equal amount of times. Grade: B.
Other misses would have to come next: Crystal Castles and My Bloody Valentine. I didn’t even hear CC, but My Bloody Valentine’s music blared loud from the main stage to the food court, where we all spent close to a million dollars each on up to two slices of pizza. Soon enough, the gang split, while Sean and I grabbed our final beers and finally met people who found us funny, while the others muscled their way up to the final band of the night and the mighty headlining legends: Tool. (Fuck the Ting Tings; Katie White may be hot as all hell, but all my respect denigrated with “That’s Not My Name”).Tool. Wow. Tool, ladies and gentlemen. Firstly, so many Tool T-shirts, like a parade, simply barraged the main stage as early as 8:45 to get a great view of this most poignant alternative-metal band. After finishing our last beers and taking pictures for older couples, we made our way to the crowd, which appeared to be a half mile long. Lodged in mud and under the dark, Jersey City night sky, the fans awaited Tool. And after light tests and sound checks, the band emerged. The headliners had arrived. Now I’m not the biggest Tool fan in the world, but you couldn’t help but to be compelled by their sound and drawn by their prowess.
Merely ten songs were played, but they lasted two hours on stage. Graphic animations of digital beings swimming in fire, giving birth to other beings, and encountering strange animals while plummeting through oceans and alternative realms, and being destroyed plagued the dual monitors to the left and right of the stage. The lead singer, Maynard James Keenan, stuck to the back near the drummer, Danny Carey, while guitarist and bassist, Adam Jones and Justin Chancellor, hung to the edge of the platform. After their set, Keenan emerged in his boxer briefs to relinquish a powerful encore. When all was said and done, the fans were not baffled by what they had seen, but astonished and brought to a whole ‘nother level of consciousness of music and sound and life and experience. Eric likes to say a lot about Tool, mostly about how amazing they are when you see them and hear them so close. And I agree. The music: you absorb it, feel it, and feel apart of what is most definitely a religious experience.The greatest tune of the night came from Tool. “Schism". Off 2001's Lateralus album, it just may be the definitive Tool song and certainly one of the most popular. This tune flat out mesmerizes and amazes you. One of the greatest songs I've ever heard live. Simply unforgettable. And just like that, it was time to go.
The rest of the night became about survival: not literally, but staying awake to be able to make it to your train stop. Coated in mud, exhausted, sweat-drenched and still able to be somehow be annoying to others, we boarded our train and made it through our transfers. We met some strange folks who looked at us weird, because of the mud and the filth on our bodies. We also met up with lady friends who had similar questions (though they were highly intoxicated from a night in the city and could barely formulate a proper sentence). Needless to say, we had the most interesting day out of anyone taking public transportation.
Around 3 AM, we finally reached our car parked at the train station in Morristown, NJ. I dropped my buddies off and though we could barely stay awake, the silence came with an unspoken vibe of satisfaction. The day was not just satisfying, but perhaps, life-changing, in the sense of spectacle and sound. It was exactly what we could have wanted in our first ever music and arts festival. The day was done. And the stories thereafter, to this very moment, would be boosted to epic status and to sensationalist proportions to those who missed our or asked about the day.It was fucking amazing. An A+ day. So the only question that remains for me is: When do tickets go on sale of All Points West 2010?
*All Pictures, except All Points West logo & the Engleside Hotel photo were taken by me. The rest came from google.
**Videos came from YouTube, as they almost always do.
For more All Points West reviews, set lists, pictures, videos, and discussion, be sure to check out the links below:
P.S. A post on Friday & Sunday will follow shortly. Also, my personal pictures and videos will be up soon, too. Keep it here!
Snow sucks.
